Wednesday, March 5, 2014

spring breakers 2014

I CANNOT BELIVE ITS FINALLY HERE!!!!! I AM SO EXCITED!!!!!!


now you might be wondering what the hell i am talking about.  Well let me tell you, as i am writing this i am currently on my way to the beach.  yes the beach la plage la playa whatever you call it.  im going with my bestest friend in the whole world who i have known since primary school.  i am super excited because [according to my friend] there are many cute boys who we can oogle at but she will  be the only one to actually approach them while i stand off to the side being awkward and reading my book.


now maybe you are thinking, well why dont you just google how to flirt? well i did that already and i came here to tell you that why they may be fantastic ideas i am still to shy to do things like that.  besides why do i need to talk to the boys when my friend will do all the talking? oh yea because i so fucking tired of being the "ugly" friend.  like personally i dont think im ugly but still there are many features that should attract the species known as the male.

examples of said attractive features are things like: i eat alot and i might let you have some of my french fries, i can be really funny sometimes [but mostly its just me being a bitch and people think im joking]  and alos i wont cheat on you because ive worked so hard to get you in the first place.  you're welcome now all i have to do it wait for boys to show up in my front yard.

so as my friend and i draw nearer and nearer to our destination i bid you all farwell and happy travels on your spring holidays.

making milkshakes [for all the boys in my yard]

sincerely,
the anon

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